UK TV review issue 40 by Lorraine Fencer

"Kids on Top" (BBC1, Wed, 7pm) Scary stuff. Children shopping. At least the parents are about to take control when the tiredness kicks in & the novelty wears off. Pot noodles get pretty boring after a few days. Seems like an interesting little experiment this, but so far, very predictable. Shows what the kids think about smoking though.

"Wife Swap" (CH4, Tues 9pm) Going for the lowest common denominator vote? Cheap Ch4 thrills in the hope people will tune in, in case its the "other" sort of wife swapping? Never! Am I the only one who wants to string these people up? Bunch of nutters. And what on earth does "goppin" mean? Gah, horrible parents, horrible kids. That Sonia deserves a medal for putting up with her waste of space other half every day, then the in-bred bigots from hell for our amusement. There's meant to be 2 or 3 more in the series, but I'm not sure if I can bear to watch.

"World Darts" (BBC2, all week) Televisual Temazepan! I think they're trying to glam it up a bit though. Camera trickery, shots of random women's cleavages, and a U2 soundtrack. But at the end of the day it's still darts. One Hundred and Eighty & fat blokes drinking pints. I can see exactly the same in my local, and feel like I've got a social life at the same time, so why am I watching it on the tv?

"The Fall of Milosevic" (BBC2, Sun, 9pm) Don't panic, I'm not going all intellectual on you, but there's been nothing on this week except documentaries and docu-soaps. No entertainment at all. But goodness me, the number of world leaders and other international important bods on this programme? That doesn't happen every day. Shocking images, the harsh reality of war brought into your living room, with an awful lot of subtitles. It's fascinating to see what really goes on behind the spin of politics, especially when you can remember it all happening. Pitched low enough to be accessible to those who "Don't Do Politics", but without the patronising tone we've come to expect of late. 10 out of 10.

"Crossroads" (ITV, weekdays, 5pm) is back. Again. I think. It's looking suspiciously like Sunset Beach only with British weather. Interesting idea. But, in all honesty, give it up. Please.

And finally... quiz answer of the week. Carpet.

Lorraine

Previous reviews

Lorraines predictions for 2003

UK TV awards 2002 the Lorr's Lorraine's lyrical tribute to xmas TV

Issue 38 34 33 32 31 30 29 28 27 26 25 24 23 22 21 20

New Year Retro Review Christmas Retro Review

Celebrity Bashings